I've loved Roald Dahl ever since I read his short story, Parson's Pleasure. As much as I love his story telling, I absolutely adore his Revolting Rhymes! He's a true master at putting his own evil spin on old, popular fables and rhymes. The following is my own attempt at redoing Jack and Jill. Hope you like it.
Jack and Jill
Jack and Jill
went up the hill
to fetch a pail
of water.
Jill carried the pail
all the way up,
While Jack arsed-around
behind her.
Said Jack unto Jill,
"Can you slow down, please?"
"I need to catch
a breather!"
Jill smiled kindly,
sat down beside him,
said, "you're wheezing
like an ol' geezer!"
"You know smoking can kill you,
and yet you persist,
why do you do it,
oh brother?"
Jack looked quite silly,
as he puffed on a ciggy.
But his joy,
was like no other.
Said Jill unto Jack,
"What could it be,
that makes you smoke,
so frivolously?"
Jack smiled at her,
as he lit up another,
and said,
"Ah, but it makes me look real natty!"
On the way back home
Jack stopped with a groan,
and coughed up his lungs
all asunder!
Then Jack fell down
and broke his crown.
And Jill?
Didn't dare smoke thereafter.
went up the hill
to fetch a pail
of water.
Jill carried the pail
all the way up,
While Jack arsed-around
behind her.
Said Jack unto Jill,
"Can you slow down, please?"
"I need to catch
a breather!"
Jill smiled kindly,
sat down beside him,
said, "you're wheezing
like an ol' geezer!"
"You know smoking can kill you,
and yet you persist,
why do you do it,
oh brother?"
Jack looked quite silly,
as he puffed on a ciggy.
But his joy,
was like no other.
Said Jill unto Jack,
"What could it be,
that makes you smoke,
so frivolously?"
Jack smiled at her,
as he lit up another,
and said,
"Ah, but it makes me look real natty!"
On the way back home
Jack stopped with a groan,
and coughed up his lungs
all asunder!
Then Jack fell down
and broke his crown.
And Jill?
Didn't dare smoke thereafter.
